Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Yes, a 50 Shades Post

… but I haven’t read the book. This isn’t going to be about the content of the book, but more about what other people are saying about it.

At my job, some of the ladies there have a little book club. Last month, they read Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close (they finished it up just as I was hired). This month, it’s 50 Shades of Grey.

Nearly every day in the lunchroom, they’re talking about this book. It’s not so much that they’re discussing it – its more what they’re saying:

What a psychopath!
"It's so abnormal!"
But everything in this book is so weird – you HAVE to be some kinda weirdo to be into this.
There’s a reason he’s like this right? We’re gonna find out what made him such a freak?”

And so on, and so on.

It’s really starting to grate on my nerves. I know that it is probably best for me to say nothing, and as such I’ve sat there biting my tongue.

Then they keep asking me to join their book club. When trying to politely refuse, solely because of their reaction to this book, I mentioned something vague about the fact that I’d probably identify more with the book and it’s odd that everyone around is proclaiming it as weird and being judgmental.

A response: “Ugh! But it IS weird!!”

Oh, it’s weird… They must be psychopathic freaks to enjoy this? Well, you can keep judging…

…but you can’t stop reading it either, right? What does that say?

I've thought about taking lunch in my room until they're done with this, but I don't fancy being cooped up in the same space ALL day long; I need a change of scenery now and again. And there is a positive to their talk.

In a way, I should probably thank these ladies. Having them unknowingly tear to pieces activities that are close to my heart and lifestyle has made me rise up to defend it inside. It has made me more accepting of myself and of other people. I have had problems accepting my desires, but having them bash these sorts of activities made me realize how normal they can be, and how good. I'm happier now than in any previous relationship, and I have TTWD to thank. As long as it makes you happy, and is done in a safe, sane, and consensual manner, then who should really care?

I’m a step closer to self-acceptance, and in a roundabout way, its due to them! So I’ll thank them, but silently. Open discussion of such things would probably hurt my career and make my worklife difficult.


  1. See you don't even need to read the book to get something good out of it. So, it was already totally worth it, and you can skip reading it all together!
    I am what it is like to struggle with ttwd. Sometimes I bask in it, and other times, I feel almost ashamed for how I feel. And I do think it is weird to have all of America talking about this book now, I mean some of that is really not mainstream...

    1. I'm hearing the writing is awful, and many non-vanilla people are offended by the set-up. Its also been compared to Twilight.

      ... but I liked Twilight. Sure, it wasn't literature, but it was silly escapism story.

      I think a lot of people have that up and down relationship with ttwd - its too hard not to, especially because of societal pressures getting into our heads at times.

  2. Everyone at my office finishes the series, and then doesn't know what to read next because they don't know what smutty books would compare. I am on occasion tempted to simply link them my journal, or write up some of my true sessions with Master.

    1. Hahaha, that would be a laugh! I'm wondering if this will happen here... there are 3 books so there's time before the next series for their club..

  3. You make a good point - they bash the book and the things happening in it, yet they can't put it down. It makes you wonder if they really think it's so weird or if they just think that's what society wants them to think.

    1. I have wondered about some people that are reading it - are they really that offended by it, or are they pretending to throw people off their own track?

  4. I find it amusing how much play this book is getting since everyone seems to agree the writing is atrocious. One wonders if the author chose the subject just for that reason.

    I want to offer this suggestion. In a friendly way insinuate yourself into their conversation. Then point out that statistics claims 25% of people engage in this kind of thing. That's 1 in 4. Then say something like "I wonder how many people in this very room are into that stuff?" Then exit politely and let them wonder who is. I did something similar and the conversations were hilarious. Pretty soon they were looking slyly at one another believing they had figured out a sectet. And who knows, maybe they had.

    1. That sounds wonderful! I don't think I have the countenance to pull it off, but oh man, that's a great idea!


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