Friday, August 16, 2019

Uniform

Sir says that he is thinking about modifying my current dress code a little.

As of right now, when I am not at work, or working out, I am to wear a dress or skirt. I do own some leggings to wear under the skirts in the wintertime and to exercise.

I have gotten a little lax in that there have been times I wore leggings with no skirt, when I was not exercising. But it has not been very often. I have also pretty much stopped exercising, and as it is not winter, I suppose I've been adhering to dress code more.


Sir is thinking of adding a requirement to my dress code, for indoors only.

Basically, a black leotard.

So that when I am in the house, it would be my uniform.

We looked at a few.

The one he liked best thus far was this:



We would of course need multiple items, enough to get me through a week or so between laundry.
And I don't know if it would change in the winter. Would I be expected to sleep in it? How would having my monthly cycle impact this?

I'm not yet sure how I feel about this. On the one hand, it is another level of control. On the other... part of me wonders what the ultimate goal is. I wonder how compliant I would be. Especially when I am cold. If I will be bratty.

When we talked about it, he said it was a way to direct what I wear, and it would be easier.

Easier for whom, I asked? Certainly not for me. If you have worn one of these, they're not the easiest to get into or out of. They're not the most functional if you have to use the restroom. If you are menstruating, they're a downright pain in the ass. And what about underwear? Do I not wear them now?

But while those are valid things to consider, they're not really the point. Whether it is easier for me or not is irrelevant. If Sir decides it, this is what will be.

Sunday, August 11, 2019

Invisible Tether

It seemed like it had been a good long while since Sir and I got to engage in any real sex or kink or scene. We'd been on conflicting schedules, and the last few times we did get a chance, something awkward or awful happened.

I was starting to be concerned that we were going to go through a really dry spell vanilla, kink, or otherwise.

Luckily I was wrong.

We had some time to ourselves Sunday afternoon.

Sir gave me a good reminder on his control over me. Without using anything but himself. No toys. No constraints. Just him and me.

Just his hands on my body. Caressing...coaxing. Cracking. A pinch here, a tap there.

Getting me completely in his thrall. Keeping me there with only his hands and his voice.

It felt like his words were around me, binding me in place.

Reminding me that I am his.

💗

Sunday, August 04, 2019

Abort: A Scene Fail

One night after work, Sir let me know that something was going to go down after dinner. 

I love that; the anticipation. Thinking about it during our meal.

After dinner and a shower, Sir wasted no time, grabbing me by the hair and gently but firmly pulling me to the living room, where he had set up one of our dining chairs. He had me sit. I was naked and still slightly damp from the shower.

He tied my thighs to the chair, near my knees, pulling them apart; keeping them open and therefore me exposed.

He tied my ankles.

He tied my hands as well, down at each side to the chair legs.


Chairbound.

He then tied my hair to the back of the chair. Upon completion, he circled like a waiting vulture. A smack here, a pinch there.

He got out our purple paddle, running it over my body, up to my neck, settling under my chin, lifting it up to force me to meet his eyes.

I could feel the paddle sliding just a little. More and more forward, away from my neck.

Finally, it happened.

It came free and struck me right in the mouth.

My stupidly open mouth.

And right on to the tooth I just had dental work on. (It was so bad, Sir had actually brought me to the ER before we could see a dentist).

The pain was excruciating. I felt like it exploded through my face, though it was just a little tap.

I now fully understand the phrase "burst into tears". They too, exploded out of me, while I tried to contain myself. I couldn't, though, and it just seemed like I was hyperventilating.

Sir did not mean to do it.

Sir feels extremely awful about it.

I think he was at a loss for what to do first. So he settled on holding my head until I calmed down a little. He then untied my hands, which flew immediately to my face. He knew that a normal reaction would be to try and "protect" the area, but my hands were bound. It made me feel more vulnerable not being able to do so and probably increased my reaction. I think I was also crying because it had been so long since we were able to get together like this, and I felt like it was all ruined. We were going to miss out. I was disappointed.

After, he took me over to the couch and let me snuggle in all the blankets.

Thankfully, after another dental visit, the tooth is okay (but requires additional unrelated work).

Aftermath.

Hopefully we'll get to revisit this again.

Wednesday, July 31, 2019

Feet to Ankle


Just a little photo from when Sir tied me up last week. We DID get things back on track. I like the symmetry and the feet.

I find it amusing that our vacuum cleaner and dance pad are back there, though. Normally if we know a photo is going to be taken, there is an attempt to "make it pretty".

Sunday, July 21, 2019

Passing Embarrassment


So, a few weeks ago, Sir got bit by the play-bug and brought out some toys.

I was excited! It had been a good long while.

He decided to use the wrist and ankle cuffs he recently purchased. They're velcro, and once on, he hooked my wrists to my ankles, leaving me especially prone.





This was thrilling, but also nerve-wracking. Being so vulnerable, being left wide open like that. I have insecurities about my vagina.

Adding to this was what happened next. I forget the complete circumstances now, but I think Sir made me laugh. And in this stressor position I couldn't help myself.

I let out a big fart. And then I was mortified. And I had some nervous laughter. Which made me do it again. And again. All while I'm spread wide, butt-naked.

 Finally it stopped and my laughing turned to crying. I was completely embarassed. Laying there, tears streaming down my face. My only saving grace is that there was no odor.

Sir and I have been together for over 8 years now, but I still am not completely comfortable when it comes to these bodily functions. Sir was laughing with me, his mouth agape, hand covering his mouth. I know he felt bad. (For me). But you just couldn't deny the hilarity in the moment.

And after all that, it was kind of a mood-killer, if you know what I mean. Sir eventually got us back on track, but it took some doing.

I always think to myself that someday, I will be over these hangups... but I really don't think I will be. And part of me is okay with that. There are times when things are unavoidable, or you need help of a sensitive nature. I get that. But I don't know if I would want to be that person that is just okay with doing those gross things in front of their partner for no particular reason.  That's just me, I guess.

Part of me is experiencing a touch of mortification just writing this, knowing people will read about it. So why am I sharing this?

I'm not exactly sure. But there it is!

And I hope it doesn't happen again.

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