Friday, July 21, 2017

Simple Service

Sometimes, I have a later shift where Sir has work in the morning.

This was one of those days. I could have slept in, but I chose not to. Instead, I got up a few minutes after Sir. I made coffee. I made him breakfast. I waited for him to get out of the shower. While he was eating, I made his lunch for the day, and let him know what he could easily heat up for dinner, as I'll be home late from work.

These are just simple things, but they're definitely part of my submission. Do I want to make his lunch everyday... well, sort of, but not really. It is certainly easier to just make one for myself. To make his too is extra time and effort. I have to really plan out my time - making both the night before as I don't have time to do it in the morning. It's a small task, but those minutes add up, and I have a 90 minute commute each way - I HAVE to get my ass out the door. Making his lunch reinforces my service to him, to do this. That is the part I like, making his life easier, being reminded of my place.

I don't usually make his morning breakfast - I am typically out of the house before he wakes. I usually do make enough coffee for both of us, and leave his hot so its ready for him, though.

So, today was a nice little morning where I was focused on the right things. I hope I can continue with this mindset.

I need to remind myself of all the little things that we do that DO reinforce our roles in the house and in our chosen lives. It is easy to forget them sometimes.

Wednesday, July 19, 2017

Being Direct

Sir says that I am very direct.

He is not wrong. I am usually upfront about most things. I strive to be honest, sometimes brutally so. It can be difficult for me to be diplomatic when necessary (usually at work). It can be difficult for me to back off of certain things.

While he enjoys this quality, as he never has to worry about me playing those games where I give him the silent treatment, or he has to figure out why I am upset - I will just tell him, sometimes he doesn't like it.

He says it's not a very submissive quality.

I guess that is true too. I have an outgoing personality. I am willfull. Submission doesn't come naturally for me; I have to work at it. But I am not happy when I am the dominant one in the relationship, which is an easy role for me to fall into.

So I suppose I have to figure out how to balance the good qualities of being a very direct person with also retaining a submissive manner for him.

How am I to do that?

I suppose it has to do with phrasing (Are we not doing phrasing anymore?!)

Sunday, July 16, 2017

Sinful Sunday: Hands

Sir and I in the back of our friends' car while in North Carolina:

Sinful Sunday

Thursday, July 13, 2017

Collar Update and Drunken Fishie Rewards!

Today, Sir let me have three fishies! He even dropped one into my wine glass.

Hello, drunken fishie.

I'd been really busy at work lately but I guess I did a lot when I got home. I went for a jog (yay health and weight loss), cooked a teriyaki chicken casserole (in this 92 degree heat), did the dishes, did some gardening, took a shower, and called my mom and grandmom. I think he was more happy about the food appearing and the dishes disappearing, though.

Since my last post a few days ago, things with the collar are going well. Just after I clicked the "Publish" button, he actually had me come into the living room to collar me. I guess the talk made an impact on him. I think the "I haven't been properly collared for two years" statement was a bit of an epiphany for him as well. So, he re-collared me.

My new rule is that I must wait for him to collar me himself every evening after work - meaning I cannot collar myself when I get home, It will be done by him when he gets home (usually about a 2 - 3.5 hour time difference).

The second day when he got home I closed the door and kneeled by the collar cabinet, waiting. The next day he made me kneel and put it on me (which was a struggle since my legs were sore from jogging - I just started again). Yesterday he collared me just before bed (since I went to bed super early last night). And tonight, he made me go get the collar right after dinner (he made me wait because, "I'm eating, bitch!").

I think this is working for now. Just working on this. And I think really working on having his lunch ready  before I go to bed being another priority. With these two things, we can start to get back on track.

I am cautiously optimistic!
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