Sir and I have realized over the years, that I definitely have a little side.
I don't know her exact age, but somewhere between 5-8 I think.
There are times where it's more pronounced than others.
But there is a time of day where it is pretty consistent. And that is bedtime.
Every night when we're getting ready for bed, I definitely feel little. Perhaps its that nighttime desire to be tucked in and cuddled. Perhaps a desire to feel safe before bed. Safe like a child, when life was simpler, and there was less to worry about.
Maybe it's nightly exhaustion removing some internal barriers.
I'm sure now, in listing an "age" there's some things there to unpack in therapy (my parents split when I was 7, so that being my age range... I'm sure that's linked somehow).
But I think I'm okay with it. Sometimes being little is confusing for me. But sometimes it really is nice to just... let everything go, and know I am safe with Sir. That he is going to take care of me, and everything is going to be okay until tomorrow.
Hi Lea,
ReplyDeleteI can relate to this. I also have a little side that emerges frkkm time to time. Fortunately, Rick also enjoys this side of me and taking care of me.
Hugs
Roz
woohoo! welcome to the sometimes-little club :) I often feel that I exist as an adult AND a little simultaneously, if that makes any sense.
ReplyDeleteComing out of the closet does not just mean your sexual desire. I found the woman I wanted to marry, and I found the courage to tell her that there are times I just feel like being a little boy. She understood, she would accept those times I feel like this, but she reminded me that one of us must be the adult at all times. What she also said with a smile, that little boys can be naughty at times, and so expect the Mommy to come out and address those times. I soon found out what she meant, a spanking, corner time, and learned that this person truly loved me, understood me, spanked bottom or not, I came out and admitted a very deep secret and the marriage is strong because of it. Jack
ReplyDeleteIt's so beautiful when you can let go like that and feel that safeness. This is lovely.
ReplyDelete