Sir and I had a good, low key weekend. It snowed here, so we spent all of Saturday indoors, watching it come down, playing video games, and being snuggly.
I was a bit of a grump Saturday morning. I think I was hangry. Sir told me that he was going to the dishes and then we'd have breakfast. I am typically the cook around here. It's one of the ways I serve him. I went to my computer to look something up while Sir finished the dishes (so I could cook). After awhile, I picked up delicious smells in the apartment. When I went into the kitchen to investigate, this is what I found:
Sir made us French Toast! It was delicious and I appreciated the gesture. It's nice to be taken care of once in a while.
Sir also took care of me and gave me the impact play I apparently needed. Besides me obviously craving it, Sir said he was planning on doing something like that soon. I suppose I radiate need sometimes? I think he might have struck me with every implement we have in toy bag. : D
I was feeling a bit apprehensive about admitting my craving here the other day. Feeling like it was selfish to think of my own wants. I know that it is silly, but sometimes I feel like I should focus solely on Sir, and not my personal wants. At the same time, I know Sir wants to know what I am thinking and feeling, and I am a human being. Even being submissive to Sir, there are still times where I will desire things. Hopefully with time I will get better with this.
I think part of my need for the impact/pain is as stress relief. I am highly stressed right now, working myself ragged, and constantly worried about our household and supporting the two of us. The scene... it helps, it really does. And it makes me just want to crawl all over Sir and snuggle. I feel like it really breeds more intimacy between us.
Saturday night, Sir also used the pegs on me! He applied about 4-5 to each breast. And also one on my bottom lip, for reasons only known to him. It was more intense feeling than I thought. I think it was a combination of the weight and multiplication of pain being added by all the pegs at once. I felt really proud for having done it and and I'd like to try it again.
On Sunday, I shoveled us out while Sir took a shower. That's usually a task he takes on. So for the weekend, he cooked us breakfast and I shoveled snow. We changed roles. But don't worry Sir, I don't have any thoughts about being in charge!
I was a bit of a grump Saturday morning. I think I was hangry. Sir told me that he was going to the dishes and then we'd have breakfast. I am typically the cook around here. It's one of the ways I serve him. I went to my computer to look something up while Sir finished the dishes (so I could cook). After awhile, I picked up delicious smells in the apartment. When I went into the kitchen to investigate, this is what I found:
Sir made us French Toast! It was delicious and I appreciated the gesture. It's nice to be taken care of once in a while.
Sir also took care of me and gave me the impact play I apparently needed. Besides me obviously craving it, Sir said he was planning on doing something like that soon. I suppose I radiate need sometimes? I think he might have struck me with every implement we have in toy bag. : D
I was feeling a bit apprehensive about admitting my craving here the other day. Feeling like it was selfish to think of my own wants. I know that it is silly, but sometimes I feel like I should focus solely on Sir, and not my personal wants. At the same time, I know Sir wants to know what I am thinking and feeling, and I am a human being. Even being submissive to Sir, there are still times where I will desire things. Hopefully with time I will get better with this.
I think part of my need for the impact/pain is as stress relief. I am highly stressed right now, working myself ragged, and constantly worried about our household and supporting the two of us. The scene... it helps, it really does. And it makes me just want to crawl all over Sir and snuggle. I feel like it really breeds more intimacy between us.
Saturday night, Sir also used the pegs on me! He applied about 4-5 to each breast. And also one on my bottom lip, for reasons only known to him. It was more intense feeling than I thought. I think it was a combination of the weight and multiplication of pain being added by all the pegs at once. I felt really proud for having done it and and I'd like to try it again.
On Sunday, I shoveled us out while Sir took a shower. That's usually a task he takes on. So for the weekend, he cooked us breakfast and I shoveled snow. We changed roles. But don't worry Sir, I don't have any thoughts about being in charge!
Mmmm, I'm totally having French Toast for lunch.
ReplyDeleteI often have internal conflicts over my desires and wanting to do only what he wants. The best way to deal with it is to talk to him, I think. Then he can make the decision.
Lux encourages me to share my cravings with him, just as much as he shares them with me. He's not a fan of the whining demands for certain play, but mentioning cravings, or a quick request puts the bug in his ear to decide when he wants to have that play soon.
ReplyDeletePutting desires on the table, but keeping things relaxed isn't stepping out of bounds, or any form of topping from the bottom. It's yet another thing to simply share with your domlyperson.
I do share with him. I like the idea that if I share, it is still his decision on what to do. And he's said in the past that he wants to know so he can make the best/fully informed decisions.
ReplyDeleteI still get those gnawing feelings from time to time that mentioning it is steering the activity. I hope with time that will fade.