Saturday, April 08, 2017

This Is Why I'm Not Out About My Kink

This winter, I spent my time visiting friends and family. I had recently reconnected with a childhood friend; someone I've known since I was in diapers. In college we had a falling out and we drifted apart, but we reconnected when she asked me to be a bridesmaid at her wedding this past summer.

We had a pretty nice visit. She is a homeopathic doctor, and I work outdoors in nature, so we were connecting this way. Over the course of the visit, she asked me some pretty specific questions; questions that I suppose were related to her unofficial diagnosis of me in her head. I realize that for some people turning that part of themselves off is difficult. I have known her my entire life, and I know that her heart is in the right place. So I decided to disclose the truth about the nature of my relationship with Sir to her, especially if she was using the information to have some kind of medical idea about me in her head.

Though she didn't get angry, and we didn't have a fight or anything like that, she made it pretty clear that my kink was not okay. She believes that she can cure me of it. She believes that because of my traumatic childhood, I have sought out kink as a coping mechanism; that if I had a "normal" childhood, I would not need kink.

I explained my views on that pretty thoroughly to her, and let her know that her beliefs, especially as a medical professional, would likely offend many kink clients she may have. She has apparently "cured" a client of kink in the past, and they had mixed feelings in the aftermath about it.

My childhood was not ideal, but I don't feel that overall, I have been traumatized by it. I've worked through it and I'm pretty okay. It certainly could have been worse. I don't feel that I use kink to cope.

There is nothing wrong with me.

I don't need to be cured.

This isn't the first time I've come up against backlash; but I suppose it hurts more coming from a person I've known nearly my entire life, and a person that has dedicated her life to homeopathy. To holistic healing, and to helping people. I figured if anyone would understand, it would be her.

Sunday, April 02, 2017

Don't Forget!

This morning, I left my wristcollar in the bathroom after I went to weigh myself (because obviously I have to do that completely naked; that bracelet could add TONS to my weight, haha!)


Well, Sir has been getting frustrated with me forgetting to put it back on lately. When he found it, he had me face myself down on the couch, and he got out the belt. He struck me over 20 times, asking me, "What did you forget?" repeatedly. Apparently, my first responses weren't submissive enough, contrite enough, perhaps. Eventually they changed and were to his liking. He placed the wristcollar back on, and we went on to have a lovely day.

We watched Pete's Dragon while snacking, and later we went to visit a new park and had a little picnic.

Hopefully I can remember to put the wristcollar RIGHT back on!

Friday, March 24, 2017

Giving Him the Choice

I'm slowly trying to adjust to my schedule, and make things more seamless than they were last year. I've been working on time management- in particular, making sure that I have everything ready to go for the next morning before I go to bed. I'm bathed, clothes set out, teacup washed, teapot washed, lunch for me and for Sir, and breakfast ready before I get into bed.

I've also been trying to work on getting what I can ready in the in-between time where I am  home from work, and am waiting for Sir to get home. I've been using this time to decompress a little; have a snack, watch some HGTV. But I've been cutting that vegging time a little shorter so I can make the next days lunches, and wash dishes before Sir gets home and I start dinner. It works out better than doing it right before bed.


I've been thinking about ways I can be more submissive to Sir and take his needs and wishes more into account. Lately, I've been asking him every day what he prefers for dinner. Usually there are 2 choices. Sometimes he picks what he thinks is the "easier option" to be kind to me. Sometimes he just picks what he wants. One night he wanted neither and really wanted to go out for fish, so we did. But I am making the effort to put his wants first.

Thursday, March 23, 2017

Sir's New Car

Exciting news! Sir bought a new (to us) car! His old one finally gave out, and it was cheaper to put the money it would take to fix it temporarily into the down payment for a more reliable vehicle.

This is not Sir's exact car, but the same model.

He traded in his old Hyundai Elantra for a 2014 Nissan Sentra that had less than 7K miles on it. Sir even said he'd take me for a ride in it this weekend! In memoriam of his car, Sir played me this song after I asked him if we could go for a drive in it together:





It just sounds like the perfect moseying along in the car song. Hopefully this one will last him just as long (if not longer) than his previous.
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