Saturday, November 26, 2011

Losing Self

Long time…

I feel like I've sort of dropped off the face of the planet. I’ve been working 2 jobs, 6 days a week, often for 12+ hour days. When I am home, I usually just drop into bed. I’m overworked, overtired, stressed, and sick. I don’t know how Sir has been dealing with this lately; he’s been so kind and patient. He’s been my rock.

Our chosen lifestyle has taken a little bit of a backseat lately because all of this. I’m always running, and our time together is very limited. Even so though, he’s been wonderful. It’s amazing to have someone that is there for you. That will order you to sleep, because its what you need, and you’d likely forgo it otherwise. Lately, his Dom role has been mainly in taking care of me. Making sure I sleep, get my work done, and take care of myself. And sometimes, I really need that. A Dom’s role is to take care of his submissive, and I am definitely the kind of person that doesn’t take care of herself all the time. When I am working and trying to get ahead, things slip. I’ll not sleep so I can get things done. As a result, I’ve been a bit of a bear to be around lately, I feel. But Sir can calm that down in a way that others can’t, and I think some of that is due to our dynamic. Some of it is just intrinsically him. I’m not sure when things will calm down in my working world, not for months at least, but I feel much better knowing he is looking out for us.

He keeps me grounded, and keeps me from losing myself. I'm throwing so much of myself into everything and everyone else lately, that sometimes I feel like I'm losing me. He is always there to remind me of who I am, and keep me on the right track.

Thank you, Sir. I love you, and I'm counting down the days until our vacation!


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  2. I received a few comment notifications via email that have gone into the ether here. I thought I'd respond.

    Firstly to both Anonymous persons:

    Thank you. I really appreciate reading your comments and it honestly makes my day. If you're looking to do the same for someone else, definitely get out there and do it! Even though I've not had time to read so much lately, there are many blogs out here written by people that inspire and help and are just quite amazing. You can absolutely be one of them for someone else, and the thought that someone out there is reading these and appreciating it is very heartening. Thank you again!

    Also, thank you for enjoying my blog layout. I've not been running this blog for that long, just a few months, but I have had other websites and journal type sites in the past. Blogger makes it really easy to put a blog together, and I recommend it!

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