Friday, November 16, 2012

Hey out there. I'm still alive, still kicking it one day at a time. The past month has been really rough with this new job. I've gone back and forth many times about resigning or staying. I've attempted to resign twice, but got talked into trying to stick it out. Today was a more or less good day, and it gives me small hope. Plus, the paycheck isn't too shabby now that I'm finally getting one!

In the meantime though, I am extremely overworked, exhausted, and stressed. I get to work around 7:30a, and usually stay until after 5, and then I do more work when I get home. I also work on Saturdays. It's killing me a little. Because of this, Sir decided that we should put our D/s on hold. I understand where he's coming from, because honestly, I can barely keep my head above water here without adding additional demands, but... I miss it. I'm sad that its not a part of us right now. It's an added layer in me thinking about the career that I want.

We also have plans to move, in the next year or so. I need to save up a lot in order to do this, and maybe if I can stick this out for a while, and take the suffering a little bit, the payoff will be the things I need to achieve those goals. I need a job where when I go home, I'm done. No extra things, just relax until the next day. Maybe next  year?


Thursday, November 01, 2012

Hurricane and New Job Update

Here in NJ I'm just fine. We were very fortunate. The worst we got was that the cable, phone, and internet went out. The lights flickered, and we lost power for a total of one minute.

The areas around me however were hit hard. There are downed trees everywhere, no one can get gas, many areas are flooded. My one job has been closed this entire week. I'm actually hating the new job, and I really want to quit so much that I actually drafted a resignation letter. But I've been waffling on whether or not to send it. I applied for a job in Connecticut and I think that if I get an offer there, I'll quit this job. If not, I'll try and stick it out, but its really making me miserable and it's scaring Sir how miserable I am. It's affected our D/s, again in that I'm overworked, overstressed, overtired and I've not had much time to concentrate on us. I'm also being more cranky and bratty and less inclined to follow rules.

Last weekend before the storm he actually tied me to his bed and struck me 101 times with different implements, until I cried. He said I needed the catharsis, and I think he was right. After that though, I was a pile of mush so we just stayed in bed for the rest of the day, essentially. I did need it, but the trade off comes in time to complete tasks for the new job.

I'm seriously hoping I get the job in Connecticut so that I would feel justified in resigning from this job that I've worked at for a total of 3 weeks (only two of which we've been open).

I hope everyone fared well this past week!
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